The Story of Captain Purple

A long long time ago was a time when strange and scary things happened every day. Children had to play soccer in dusty fields with wobbly footballs because there was nowhere to get a round soccer ball. And when they played hide-and-go-seek the best places to hide were in prickly bushes. Mommies and Daddies didn't like it when kids played, because when the soccer players and the hide-and-go-seekers came home, the Mommies and Daddies had to cover scratchy itches with sticky smelly mud. That was a long long time ago when there were no pools and playgrounds. It was a time when Elm Park Pool was only a wish. It when all children couldn't learn to swim and couldn't learn to dive. There wasn't a chance to play water polo even if someone had a shiny new round water polo ball. Kids wanted to swim and play, but they couldn't - not without a pool! Once, the kids tried synchronized swimming in the dusty field but that just made their Moms and Dads mad. They got mad because the kids got extra itchy, and that meant extra sticky and extra smelly mud. Needless to say, the Elm Park kids from a long long time ago, didn't practice synchronized swimming more than that one time.

Anyway, there was this boy . . . or was it a girl? It really doesn't matter, because there was this person who loved to dive, to swim, to play water polo and do synchronized swimming, and he (or was it she?) sat on a big rock every day - and sometimes at night too - and wished very hard for a swimming pool with a diving board, with music, with water polo nets and lifeguards for all the kids who in Elm Park.

Well, wouldn't you know it! One day when he (or was it she?) was wishing really hard, and the other kids were scratching itches really bad, a man-in-a-white-hardhat, and a long line of trucks and steam shovels came rolling onto the dusty field and stopped. The huge machines shuddered and rumbled, and the shuddering and rumbling made the ground wobble. The wobbling ground made the kids stop scratching. Wouldn't you know it! but all the Moms and Dads came out of their houses and down the street and onto the field and right up to the trucks and the steam shovels. The man-in-the-white-hardhat stood in the middle of all the machines.

One brave Dad asked, "Excuse me sir. Sir? Helllllooooooo," and the man-in-the-white-hardhat said nothing and just looked the other way.

Then one brave Mom walked up and asked, "Excuse me sir, but what are you doing here?" The man-in-the-white-hardhat said nothing. Meanwhile, the little boy (or was it a girl?) stood and hid in the prickly bushes and watched everything.

A little girl walked up to the man in the white hardhat and said, "Sir?"

And the man-in-the-white-hardhat said, "Why! Are you the little girl, or was it little boy? Are you the person who wished for a new swimming pool, with a diving board and water polo nets?"

The person hiding in the prickly bushes whispered, "And music too!"

The little girl's face smiled and she said, "Swimming pool?"

And the man-in-the-white-hardhat said, "Yes, that's right, and music too."

The little girls frowned and said, "No. I didn't wish for a swimming pool and music too."

Well, the man-the-white-hardhat look fiercely around the crowd and shouted, "Who wished for a swimming pool with a diving board and water polo nets?"

The person hiding in the prickly bushes whispered, "And music too!"

The man-the-white-hardhat look fiercely around the crowd and shouted, " And music too!"

No one answered.

"Well," said the man-in-the-white-hardhat, "It really doesn't matter, because I got this wish list on my papers here and it says I must build a pool with a diving board, and water polo nets," he paused, "and, oh yes, and music too." The man-in-the-white-hardhat waved at all his machines and they sprang to life and this life made the ground wobble even more than the ground wobbled before. Then he waved them to stop.

The man-in-the-white-hardhat shouted, "I forgot to ask. Where do you want this Elm Park Pool?"

Well, all the kids and the Moms and Dads pointed this way and that way and shouted things like, "Over here," and, "Over there." This confusion upset the man-in-the-white-hardhat.

Well the girl (or was it a boy?) in the prickly bushes pointed at the ground not too far away and for just a second - well, maybe two - the ground glowed. The man-in-the-white-hardhat marched over to where the ground had just glowed and stood there like a soldier standing at attention. Everyone fell silent and listened.

He said loudly, "We dig here!" And with that command, the machines sprang to life and the ground wobbled wobbled and the Moms and Dads and kids moved moved out of the way way.

Two days later, at nighttime when everyone was sleeping, the person in the prickly bushes silently went down in the big hole. He got on his (or was it her?) hands and knees and looked around at all the worms and stones and rocks that were exposed because the man-in-the-white-hardhat was building a new pool. For a second - well maybe two seconds - a little purple jellybean glowed and she (he?) picked up the bean and looked at it very carefully. The person from the prickly bushes suddenly felt very hungry and brushed off the bean and swallowed it.

Well, you for sure know what happened next. The hunger went away. However, the person from the prickly bushes felt sort of weird. He (or was it she?) looked down and saw big webbed feet with long dinosaur nails; only one eye blinked, because there was only one eye to blink; and it wasn't possible to comb its hair, because there was a sharp pointy horn in the way. "Oh dear, oh dear oh dear," it said to itself. It looked around and saw a suspicious looking purple tail and reached down to grab it, but each time it reached for the tail, the tail moved out of the way. Well this went on and on until it was spinning and spinning and getting dizzy. So, it flopped on the ground and the tail flopped down beside. Well. That made things easier and it grabbed the tail with a big claw and bit the end with sharp pointy teeth.

"Ouch!" it yelled, and threw the tail away, but it came back. It picked up the end of the tail so it wouldn't get away while it got to its feet. Frowning, and with great curiosity in its huge head, it bent over and looked between its legs. Well wouldn't you know it! It saw, between its legs, a long purple tail that went all the way around from his bum to his hand. And when it bit the tail - it hurt! Ouch! Yikes!

It was frightened. It was all purple, had one eye and one horn. "Oh no!" it thought, and it ran hard and fast out of the hole. It ran so hard that it started to fly, and it flew out the hole because now it had wings. And on the way out, it bumped into the man-in-the-white-hardhat who fell to the ground. It was scared and it flew into the prickly bushes.

The next morning all the Elm Park kids and the Moms and Dads made a circle around the man-in-the-white-hardhat. They looked at him very curiously. Then one very brave Mom asked, "Are you asleep?"

The man-in-the-white-hardhat said, "No I am not asleep."

"Then why are you on the ground?"

The man-in-the-white-hardhat looked left and looked right and said, "Because a one eyed one horned flying purple thing knocked me down, and, I thought it would be a good idea not to get up, because it might knock me down again."

A brave kid asked, "Where did it go?" "I believe," said the man-in-the-white-hardhat, "that it flew over into that prickly bush."

Everyone said, "Ohhhh."

And another Elm Park kid asked, "But where's the boy, or was it a girl, who always played in the prickly bush?"

"I don't know. I haven't seen the kid since I was bumped by the one-eyed one-horned flying purple thing."

And everyone shouted, "Oh no it ate the kid! It's a people eater."

The man-in-the-white-hardhat stared up at the sky and said, "That's right. It was a one-eyed one-horned flying purple people eater."

And the Moms and Dads grabbed their kids and ran home while the one-eyed one-horned flying purple thing watched them from the prickly bush. This made a tear form in the eye of the one eyed one horned flying purple thing because he wouldn't be able to play in the swimming pool with all the other kids.

But! Whenever there is an Elm Park swim meet, or at other super-special times, it covers its wings with a purple cape and becomes CAPTAIN PURPLE of the proud and purple Elm Park teams. And CAPTAIN PURPLE leads the charge against all other teams no matter how scary they may be.

Every now and then, if you listen carefully to the old folks who sit around the pool, you might hear one ask, "I wonder what happened to that guy, or was it a girl, who used to hide in the prickly bushes."